Winter Soulstice

by Sonus Umbra

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released August 23, 2013



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Sonus Umbra Chicago, Illinois

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Track Name: Insomniac Blue
4 AM I'm lying in the darkness
Television watching me again
Flipping channels mindlessly
Too tired to think but too awake to sleep
With every tick and murmur amplified
Weary and ossified
By whispers in the wind

I close my eyes every night
Hope to miss the change from dark to light
Pin my hopes on pills for sleep
Chasing geese instead of counting sheep

1 AM: a rumbling hum from the street
Throbbing bass with no discernible beat
2 AM: the bars begin to let out
Liberating drunken laughter and shouts
3 AM: the city still winding down
As metallic traffic noises abound
4 AM: the urban pulse has decreased
Just a random siren breaking the peace

Deprived of slumber for too long
The moving parts have come undone
Balance is gone just hanging on
To a mind slightly crazed lost in the haze
I'm scraping away, get through the day
Only to find out tomorrow is just like today

The weeks and months stumbling on
Can't tell the dusk from the dawn
It's all the same, it's so inane
The darkened third of the day
Finds me alone, cast away
So hard to think, so out of sync
Caught in an endless ring
Bedtime a hollow rite
I have become the thing
That goes bump in the night again

Hallucinations haunt my sight
I know they're false but still I feel
Slow motion visions cold and bright
Their movements blend into the real
Cling to my mind, I'm not resigned to
This broken routine, I need to dream
Turn off the light; confront the night,
But nothing changes
The TV is still watching me
Track Name: Wounded Animal
Once there was a boy who walked alone
Wounded - afraid of the night
He knelt on the rooftops
Reaching for heaven
Begging to make things right

But God never spoke
And the black sky did roar
The silence a cosmic joke
He knew then his dad was gone
But he would carry on
And he vowed to never rest
He would die or pass the test
The bastard son would never beg again

Life is just a jigsaw made of scars
Shadow play, witnessed by the stars
Can’t you see? No matter how you crawl
God will laugh and charge you for the call
Unbeliever he is fodder for the grave
Bound in chains of Godless, faithless fate
But he is not a slave
And he won’t be saved!

So he turned his back on God
Swore he’d make him pay
For the life he cast to the abyss
But the years drew first blood
And the boy lost his way
In the nest where old serpents hiss

Lost in a spiral trance
Tied up in a Gordian knot
Life’s just a game of chance
Tough luck, that snake eyes was his shot

Punch drunk and snow blind
He’s lost within the labyrinth walls
Deep inside his mind
Groping for the reins
Monster inside him
Is calling as the darkness falls
“Give me control!”
Gnawing at the chains
“You cannot destroy me
I am you and you and I
We bear the mark of Cain
Why do you grovel in shame?
Foolish moth – lured by flame
You gambled for redemption,
You’ve lost the game, you’ve lost again!”

Life is just a jigsaw made of scars
Shadow play, witnessed by the stars
Keeping silent vigil in the night
Voices from the past that sing with light
Like a midnight squall the darkness drowns his song
Tainted prism bending, twisting every word
Thoughts entangled in a mental web so strong
Isolated from a tortured mind the logic screams unheard

The years have flown
But the pain remains the same
The boy has grown
And there’s no one left to blame
The stars shine on the shadow carnival
Center stage howls a wounded animal
You can’t feel a ghost intangible
You can’t heal this wounded animal
You can’t feel a ghost intangible
You can’t heal this wounded animal
Track Name: Let it Rain
I’m haunting familiar streets
I’m empty inside; I’m incomplete
I shiver with cold regret
Broken and soaking wet
I spy on her silhouette
And smile when my heart skips a beat
I’m only an opium ghost who dreams in vain
Let me be the conduit of your pain

Let it rain
Let it wash over me
Let it rain
Let me drown and set you free

Just a dead man walking
A fading photograph
I can hear the graveyards calling
They hiss my epitaph:
Here lies a hollow man
The wayward bastard son
Slain by a sphinx that made him laugh

Exiled and out of sight
I talk to the lonely voice of night
I tell her of my duprass
Sharing the dreams we had
Adrift in a world gone mad
We have become a false karass
I’m losing the war against the universe
But I will not surrender to this curse

Let it rain
Give me all your pain
Let it rain
Let it wash away the stain

Wear the band of turquoise
And let me wear the scars
Let this phantom pilgrim
Pray beneath the shooting stars
That came to make their wishes
In the pools of your eyes
And know that the dead tell no lies
I’ll sing a secret melody
The symphony unknown
I won’t let the music die alone…
Track Name: Silence Kills
Kissed by the falling rain
Drowned in a river
I float to sea
My heart bears the mark of Cain;
All but a sliver
Of you in me
But I lost the beat
Rapt on leather seats
I died - killed by the sphinx of deceit

Leaving this world behind
Breathing the ashes
Of burned out dreams
Broken and misaligned
I met all the lashes
With silent screams
But the silence kills
On dark, satanic mills
And now I’m the fool of the ghost on the hill

Trapped in my mortal remains
My shadow sings my last refrains
In bleak counterpoint to the sound
Of a promise I broke on hallowed ground

(Let it Rain Reprise)
Let it rain!
Let it wash over me
Let it rain!
Let me drown and set you free

Just a dead man walking
A fading photograph
But the men of faith keep squawking
And their prayers make me laugh
So sure their God will save them
Absolve the sins of man;
But the dead know He doesn’t give a damn

I haunt now the graves where no one grieves
Like a leaf that clings to a tree dead long ago
Sending signals that no-one receives
But the candle’s burning low
Let it rain
Silence kills in vain…
Track Name: It's Only Fear
What can I say?
Words can’t cross the gulf
That roars between souls turned
Strangers today
Sifting through the ashes for a spark
Lost in the dark
No guiding light
Like moths in flight
Angry words are spawned to fight
It’s a pantomime;
We’re each guilty of a crime
A broken rhyme
Scream, ‘cause it’s only fear
Sadness and wasted years
Keeps us breathing near…

Cold feet of clay
Drag across the graves of dreams
Raising ghosts that scream
Night and day
Lost inside this maze I make no sound
I could be found
By prying eyes
Pierce the lies
Past the mask it’s no surprise
I’m an empty shell
No soul for me to sell
I’m broke in hell
I scream, ‘cause it’s only fear
Of the knell that echoes in my ear
Keeps me buried here

Time wastes away
Ticking to the beat
Of strange déjà vu
And hearts gone astray
Beating out of synch our music plays
In disarray
Changing keys
Seconds freeze
Knuckles white on life’s trapeze
Still the music plays
Echoes of better days
Come through the haze
Drowned by the same old fear
Its voice whispers in my ear
Keeps me buried here
Track Name: Haunted
Feel a sudden chill that makes your skin crawl?
Easy now, don’t be afraid
I’m just a lonely ghost curled up inside you
Aching to heal the lonely broken heart I once betrayed
But there’s nothing that I can do - the wound is deep
Phantom fingers try in vain
But they can’t touch your splintering heart
I breathe your pain
And haunt in silent vigil,
‘Til death bells do us part.

Roaming through the streets on winter soulstice
Funny how the snow feels warm
Kneeling on the lake, my fists are bleeding
Raging to find a way to spin the clock before the storm
But there’s nothing that I can do to change the past
Just a ghost in a human coat
Among the dregs I join in the cast
Of shadow plays
I play a stupid a vampire
Biting my own throat.

I float through the darkness
And stir the heart of night
With anger made of sadness
This Dutchman takes his flight
The sirens cast their curse
With songs of glitter and doom
And with every poisoned verse
I lie awake, unexhumed,
Haunted by dreams of mirrors.

Smashing my head against the walls of my tomb
Feeding the orchids with my blood ‘til they bloom
The roots suck me dry
But my heart’s still yearning
Aching for warmth from her candle burning
Echoes of the sadness
In the songs of Rose Hill’s ghosts
Call in the dead of night for me to follow
Lost in the labyrinth of my broken mind
Solving the jigsaw in a storm, but I’m blind
Wayward, standing at the crossroad
Mourning shooting stars that burned and died alone
Beacons blink across the half-light
Morse-coded path through the wasteland
A firefly leads me home…

Conjure me - the ghost that would be blind
Lost within the labyrinth of his mind
Cast away, the kaafir kalb will roam
Lost my way - the blizzard is my home
Capture me to shelter from the storm
Fracture me and let me be reborn
Can I flee the shadow carnival?
Can you free a ghost intangible?
Can you heal a wounded animal?
Track Name: Rebuke The Sea
You gaze through my soul
Your eyes, arresting
Conjure me from the grave
To rise on this night
When mares are nesting
Maybe I can be saved?

I know that an ocean divides us
But I would rebuke the sea
Just give me the ghost of a chance
That I might set you free

I answer your call
Your beacon leads me
Comet of my crusade
Braced for the fall
Unmasked, uncertain
Weary of masquerades

I know that an ocean divides us
But I would rebuke the sea
Just give me the ghost of a chance
And I will set you free

Hear a muffled drum
That echoes through the static?
Listen, and you will hear
Heartstrings that strum
A song of hope so tragic
But I’m still standing here…

I cry out your name, falling slowly
Listen to the wounded lion’s roar
Can’t you see there is no turning back
I’m shipwrecked upon this shore
Defying the ocean between us
I drowned to rebuke the sea
Now I’m just an epitaph denied
My death will set you free